Weddings are exciting but can cost thousands of dollars for the bride and groom. While the soon-to-be newlyweds and their families have to pay for expenses like the venue, the cake, and the DJ, the wedding party and other wedding guests have their own set of costs to consider as well.
According to Consumer Affairs, family and friends spend an average of $703 per wedding they attend.
Millennials spend about 27% more than the average person does on attending a wedding which comes out to an average of $893 to attend a wedding and $928 to be in the wedding party.
You’re likely to attend a few weddings throughout your lifetime so these numbers could easily multiply.
If you find that money is tight around wedding season or feel the need to decline an invitation just because you don’t think you’ll have enough money to be able to attend the nuptials, consider doing some of these things to cut the cost of attending a wedding.
Wear Something You Already Have or Shop the Clearance Rack
When you’re going to an important event, you may feel an urge to run out and buy something new to wear. This isn’t always necessary. If you already have a few nice outfits in your closet, consider picking one to wear to the wedding. It’s just one day and as long as you look presentable, you don’t have to go overboard by buying a new suit or a brand new dress unless you’re in the wedding party.
If you don’t have much to wear and need to buy something new, try starting at the clearance rack of your favorite store to see what’s on sale. You can find a ton of bargain deals when you simply stop and look. You may even be able to find something nice and new to you at a resale store.
Redeem Credit Card Rewards and Miles
If you have credit card reward points, cash back, or frequent flier miles, you can redeem them to cut the costs of travel if the wedding is out of state and you need to fly in.
When it comes to supporting your friend or family member who lives in another state, airfare will often be your highest expenses but credit card and airfare rewards can help supplement the cost of your flight. You can also use sites to compare airfare rates like Priceline, Kayak, or CheapFlights.com.
Or, you could just wait around for a sale if the wedding will not be for some time. Sometimes, tickets are cheaper on certain days of the week so you may be able to fly in a day early and see if you can stay with the bride and groom, a family member, or another friend until the wedding.
7 Keys to Successful Travel Hacking
Ask For a Hotel Group Rate
The hotel will be another major expense if you’ll need to spend a weekend away for the wedding. If lots of guests are coming in town for the big day, you can ask the bride and groom or wedding planner to see if they can set up a discount hotel group rate.
I did this for my wedding guests even though my wedding was technically in-town. My husband invited a few family members from Tennessee and lots of people from his hometown which is about an hour away so I asked a hotel to offer us a discounted group rate to accommodate anyone who didn’t want to drive back home right after the wedding.
At the hotel we used, they told us we needed at least 10 guests to book a room in order to offer everyone a discounted rate and that didn’t sound too bad.
In addition to getting a cheaper room rate, you can also share a room with a friend or your significant other for the wedding so you can split the costs.
Purchase Gifts on Sale
The average wedding gift can easily run you around $100 give or take and not bringing a gift for the bride and groom is pretty rude. When you want to purchase something nice that doesn’t cost an arm or a leg, consider shopping during the off season to catch some sales.
After Christmas is a great time to catch sales along with around Memorial Day. Also, if a store in your area is closing and offering some extreme discounts, you may be able to find a nice gift for the wedding there.
Ask the bride and groom to put their registry up several months in advance if they can which will give you enough time to find a reasonably-priced gift.
When you shop online, you can use Ebates to apply coupons to your purchases and earn cash back on your spending.
You can also even consider a homemade gift if your budget is super tight. Bath salts, bath bombs, and candles are all nice or even a framed photograph.
Say No to the Wedding, But Yes to the Other Festivities
Finally, realize that you may just have to say no if you truly don’t have the money.
Most couples who have traditional weddings send out save the dates and invitations early on which may help you with budgeting but if you are invited to several weddings all around the same time, you may have to take a rain check on some of them.
However, if you can’t attend the wedding, that doesn’t mean you can’t take part in any of the pre-wedding festivities. Make it known that you’re interested in coming to events like the bridal shower or the bachelor/bachelorette parties to show your support.
Attending these events will be much cheaper than coming to the wedding and you can still partake in some of the festivities.
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At the end of the day, it all comes down to your budget. While you may not be able to afford to spend hundreds of dollars to attend a wedding, you can lower the costs by using some of the tactics I shared in this post.
Realize that time will be on your side when it comes to attending a traditional or even a destination wedding because most couples will send a save-the-date or invitation well in advance allowing you enough time to save and work the extra expenses into your budget.
However, it’s not necessary to resort to running up your credit card and getting into debt to attend a wedding so there’s no harm in saying no when it’s applicable or coming up with an alternative solution.
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Wedding Budget Spreadsheet
Have you ever used any of these strategies to cut the costs of attending a wedding? Did you ever have to turn down a wedding invitation due to the costs associated with attending?
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These are really great tips!
Every time I am invited to a wedding, I try to make it work. But, rarely will I choose attending a wedding if it will cause me financial hardship (the exception was my best friend’s wedding, and that was more a problem of getting very little time off from work than money.)
One time I was able to fly into the city the morning of the wedding, and fly out the next night so I only had to pay for 1 night’s hotel. It was a bummer not being able to spend more time in Colorado, but that was the financial reality for me.
I wear one of two dresses I already own. I bought the second dress for my best friend’s wedding unplanned. I had gone to TJMax to look at the home goods and found a dress for $30 that I loved.
I have stopped feeling bad about not attending weddings. I send well wishes and gifts ($50-$100 depending on how close I am to the bride/groom) in my stead.
Not being able to get enough time off for a wedding is a bummer, but it’s pretty understandable. My husband was asked to be an usher in a wedding in August and he has to take several days off so we’ve started budgeting ahead of time and he’s put some requests in so we’ll see. He needs two weekends off in August and I doubt he’ll get it, but the wedding is local and he gets off in the afternoon on weekends so we should be able to make it work regardless.
Great tips Chonce. We had to back out of a wedding early in our marriage because we didn’t have much and hated it. We’ve used a fair number of these tips to keep costs down and thankfully most of the out-of-town weddings we’ve gone to recently have been near family so we can have a few of us stay with them to cut down on cost.
That’s great that you were able to stay with family. Hotel costs can be expensive but I get it if they’re nice quality.
Great tips! I live about 1000 miles away from some of my closest friends from home, so unfortunately, wedding costs for me include a plane ticket and a rental car (and a lot of PTO). I was invited to 3 different weddings all in the same month this summer, and obviously, there is no way I could make it to all of them. I would hate to pick and choose my friends, so I said no to all. I have stopped feeling too guilty about not being able to make it. A really nice gift is still a lot cheaper than the thousands of dollars it would have cost me to go.
Wow 3 wedding in 1 month! Weddings are expensive, and as someone who had a wedding just last year, I appreciated the people who were honest and let me know they couldn’t attend early on vs. the people who RSVPed and never showed up.
Yes wedding can be extrmely expenses for boths part (bride&grom; guests), so this year I already received 2 invites for wedding, several birthdays and a degree so being woman is normal to have temptation to buy severa new things but since I have a budget to stick I tend to buy only new clothes that can be combined with that I already have into my closet…for example some months ago I’ve bought a ’50 style black skirt that is perfect for at least 4 events….and yes sometimes best tips is say no:D
I get tempted to buy new things too when I have an event coming up but most of the time, I’m able to make it work with whatever I have in my closet.
As a wedding guest of 5 weddings this year – 4 of them in July! – this post came at the right time. Purchasing gifts on sale is our strategy right now and it’s actually been fun trying to find coupons/codes/other ways to decrease our spending on weddings.
Wow, sounds like that will be a busy month for you. I like that you’re making a game out of finding savings for gifts though. Getting started early is key.