I recently read an interesting article on Relevant Magazine’s website that discussed five things that millennial will wish they had done differently. Below are the five things that the writer, Eric Tippin, pointed out:
- Most of my spare time was sacrificed to social media.
- I knew more about celebrities than I did about my neighbors.
- I was so set on buying things, I never got the pleasure of making them.
- I wasted my life entertaining myself.
- I never found time to be quiet.
This article really got me thinking about what I thought about each of these things. It also made me question how much time we should spend thinking about what we will regret later in life, and how much value there is in dwelling on it. Nevertheless, here are my thoughts on each of these potential regrets:
Social Media
I don’t think the time we spend on social media will necessarily be regretted. Social media is something that can be done in short spurts and during time that we otherwise would be sitting down twiddling our thumbs. It also varies by person. Some people make great use of social media and find opportunities to connect with people they otherwise never would come in contact with. My interview on Wednesday with Brandy Green would have never happened had I not “met” her on Twitter. I have many more examples from Twitter, but if you throw in something like Blogging into the “social media” bucket, there’s a whole bunch of people whose lives have been changed because of social media. I don’t think I will regret the time I spent (and continue to spend) on social media.
Celebrities
I definitely agree that it’s unfortunate that we know more about celebrities than our neighbors, but it really shouldn’t come as a huge shock. There are not thousands upon thousands of media outlets reporting on your neighbors. It’s an entirely different sort of “relationship” since you have to put forth much more effort to learn about your neighbor than it does to learn about a celebrity. Overall I’m not sure it’s an apples-to-apples comparison, though I’m fairly certain we won’t regret giving more attention to our neighbors than to celebrities we will likely never meet.
Buying versus Making
I think this really comes down to what you want to do with your time. I could definitely build a desk from scratch, but I’m not sure I would get any more value or pleasure than I would if I bought a new one at Ikea. I do think that people “make” things a lot more than we think. For example, I built this website pretty much from scratch. From elementary school all the way through college you are creating things, even if it’s not in the most artsy sense of the word. You don’t have to be a chef that cooks from scratch, a musician who writes music, or someone who paints pictures to be someone who makes something. I think we all make things more often than we think…and I didn’t even mention Pinterest yet ;)
Entertainment
I think we can definitely go overboard in finding new ways to entertain ourselves. Too often, though, entertainment in general can be looked down upon as something inherently “bad.” You can argue that we spend too much time entertaining ourselves, but you have to explain what the alternative is – and usually that alternate is some other form of entertainment! For example people may say “you should spend less time on the computer,” but hardly offer up an alternative that isn’t just another form of entertainment. Overall I think it’s more about prioritizing your time and finding out what is the most beneficial use of your time. I don’t think it’s a sin to watch a three-hour football game once a week for ~16 weeks out of the year.
Quiet Time
I think 99.9% of Americans have trouble with silence. We desire noise, whether it’s music or the television or just someone talking. I think valuing silence comes with age – I can only imagine how much I will love silence after having my first child.
____________
While I think it can be beneficial to reflect on what we might regret down the road, I think it’s nearly impossible to tell. How many parents of computer programmers thought their kids would regret not playing outside more? Or how many people told successful entrepreneurs they would regret trying to work for themselves instead of taking a stable job in corporate America? We can live life thinking about the “what ifs” and regrets (and in this case, potential regrets!) or we can live one day at a time and worry more about missing out on the opportunities that will present themselves today.
____________
Photo by kamshots
Check out some of our favorite personal finance resources:
Are you getting the best credit card rewards? Check out the top cash back credit card offers (updated daily)
Make extra money: 15 ways to make money from your computer
Get the First Chapter Free!
Join our online community and get the first chapter of the book Student Loan Solution absolutely FREE!
Good post! I think a lot of it (for most of them) comes down to balance. Sure, some of the things some may go overboard with…but social media for example is simply the culture we live in. I think the one that hits closest to home is #2. We know so little about our neighbors that it really can be sad. I remember growing up we know a lot about our neighbors, but just is not true today.
@FrugalRules Balance and priorities are the name of the game, in my opinion.
I am getting to know my neighbors now that I live in a small village and it is quite nice. In big towns I liked the anonymity though, looks like I can’t move a finger here without everyone knowing and commenting. Social media definitely comes with balance. Not being able to enjoy a meal with friends because you are stuck on twitter is going too far.
@RFIndependence I can’t even imagine how different it would be to live where in a small village where similar to where you live now. With my connected garage and winter here, I probably will only see my neighbors if we are both shoveling at the same time. Otherwise will hardly see them until Spring!
@DC @ Young Adult Money everyone hibernating is something I am unfamiliar with! Here contractors show up at 6am on a lazy Sunday morning like they live here… enjoy your privacy!
i think the frenetic pace at which we live, just doesn’t lend itself for much quiet time.. and this is a bad thing that we will one day regret as a society.. even today, much of europe looks at americans as taking themselves and their careers far too seriously..
@seedebtrun The crazy thing is that I don’t think the pace will really slow down; if anything it will speed up.
Great post! So much to comment on that I could write a whole response post.
– Agree 100% on the silence thing. When I realized that about myself I started seeking it out.
– On buying vs. creating, I had my peace with this some time ago. There are just some things that I’d rather buy than create, even though I can do it myself. It’s about focusing on the 5% of things I do better than most people and hiring someone to do/make/be the rest. I found I get further ahead that way.
@AverageJoeMoney You should write a post on it ;) I think if you get enjoyment out of making things by all means pursue it! I on the other hand would rather read or draw or do something I want to do more than build a chest of drawers….
I agree with this post 100%. I think it’s sad that I know so much about tv shows and celebrities but not enough about my state’s politics, etc.
@SenseofCents Gosh people know almost nothing about their state’s politics! It’s crazy..you have to really commit time to it and almost no one does! Yet I know that Lindsay Lohan was arrested yesterday or a couple days ago…. #Yikes
Totally agree. As far as silence goes, right now, silence and time are our two most precious things. Having two little girls, a blog, and jobs means that we get very little of either <em> :) </em>
@GregatClubThrifty I can’t imagine…our friends stopped by this week for a bit and their (almost) 2 year old was running around grabbing things and talking and whatnot, and he’s a ton of fun and I love him but I can’t imagine just always having babies/small children around…I’d go insane! One day I will be ready, but not for a few years.
Of the 5 I think would probably regret spending too much time on entertainment pursuits, and not enough on quite time, and time spent in devotions and prayer. I know my wife and I have struggled a bit with spending too much of our free time in meaningless pursuits – watching TV, surfing the net, and we’re working on spending a bit more quiet time in the mornings. It all comes down to prioritizing, and figuring out what’s important to you.
@moneymatters Thanks for the comment, Peter, and I would say not spending quiet time in prayer and the word is by far one of my biggest mistakes the past year and beyond.
Excellent post DC! I actually really value quiet time, so much so that if I get interrupted I sometimes get annoyed.
In regard to social media, when it first become popular I tried it but didn’t really enjoy it. I do not do facebook at all.
For my blog I have built up a nice following on Twitter, and like you, I am connecting with people that are fun and I would have never had the opportunity to meet otherwise.
@TacklingOurDebt I like Twitter a LOT more than I like Facebook. Facebook is more a necessity and Twitter is more something I want to do : )
I can’t say for certain, but I may regret blogging. It takes so much time and if nothing comes of it I may regret it some day. I can agree completely that social media is a huge waste of time. I do it because everyone else does, but if everyone were to stop tomorrow, I’d be right behind them. Why Facebook when you can Face to Face.
@Veronica @ Pelican on Money I hear you about blogging! It’s a HUGE time suck. I recommend constantly re-evaluating why you are blogging and what your goals are with it…quitting could very well be the right choice.
@DC @ Young Adult Money @Veronica @ Pelican on Money I’m just finding myself constantly contemplating blogging or learning programming. The good thing is, soon I’m making more time for both. I’ve been helping someone out on some things and its been driving me nuts. I’ll try not to quit! Too much fun seeing what people are up to. I’ve come to know many of you too well to just quit.
I agree for sure on the quiet time. I think one thing we have kind of lost is being present with the connection, for instance, if you are out to dinner with someone, be out to dinner with them and put down the damn phone. So maybe “being present” needs to be on the list. I think social media has done wonders, but I do think they can be a major distraction from stuff we should be doing. (er, like me right now!) lol!
@Beachbudget Definitely! It’s hard to be out to dinner these days without grabbing for your phone every once in a while, checking your twitter mentions, etc.
I think people will regret spending so much time not being face to face with people. I’ll have to admit I’d include myself in that grouping.
@Money Life and More There definitely is a lot less face-to-face interaction these days. Probably only going to decrease?
I’ll bet you a lot will regret not saving for retirement. With the lack of pensions and social security being questionable, many won’t have a financial security later in life.
@JustinatTheFrugalPath I think a lot of people in their 20s and 30s simply reject the idea that there will be social security for them when they retire. For me, I pretty much see every dollar taken out of my paycheck and put towards SS as a sunk cost.
As a millenial, I’ve definitely spent a ridiculous time on social media. But I don’t think it was time I would have spent doing anything else. If anything, I’m sacrificing “quiet time” on the bus or something (or sometimes work time!) to browse FB and Twitter. I don’t really follow celebrities so no worries there.
If anything, I think I regret not working hard to save money and pay off my student loans sooner and faster. I could have been done by now! But that’s just me. :)
@OutlierModel I agree with you about social media, I see it as more of time traded. I suppose I could be reading or whatnot instead of being on social media, but it’s all about balance.
I like the new trend of kidnapping phones for fun nights out, to ensure people socialize with those that are actually in the room!
@Ugifter I’d feel naked and lost if I didn’t have my phone :(
I barely use facebook in my personal life (maybe check it once a month) and I didn’t even bother to do a page for the blog. I feel like I already spend a good amount of time on the computer and don’t need or want to spend more. I understand I’m probably missing some readers that way, but that’s OK.
I have no idea what’s going on with celebrities and could probably bump into one and not even know it lol.
@StudentDebtSurvivor I use social media like crazy, but I got on Twitter fairly early and figured out how to get massive #s of followers…so now I feel I need to keep up with it haha.
I’m not a millenial, but I can see the point of that article. Social media to grow a business or keep up with family is great, but everything we do doesn’t need to be on there. I make plans, does that count? And you’re right, anyone with a small child would kill for some quiet time, but I’m sure I’ll miss the noise when she’s grown up.
@Eyesonthedollar At this point, since I haven’t had a kid yet, I find it hard to imagine the lack of quiet time and having to sacrifice so much time and attention for a baby/kid. I am sure I will be “ready” in a few years but for now I value whatever quiet time I can find!
I think that one of the greatest life lessons any of us can learn is to actually figure out what makes us happy. It sounds kind of dumb and obvious, but you would be surprised at how many people have absolutely no idea what makes them happy. I think the five points illustrate this is some way — they seem to be distractions to fill in time when someone is unsure what they really want to be doing.
One of the huge bonuses to this is that when you do figure it out, it usually saves you a ton of money, because most things that make people happy don’t cost a lot of money.
That is an interesting perspective, but I am far from being a millenial and my thoughts have definitely changed over time.
Good points. Tell you what, with 3 kids under 10, silence is a BEAUTIFUL thing. When it comes you gotta enjoy it.
Well these are certainly interesting and I can understand why some people feel that way. I feel much the same way you do DC. I wish I had started on Social media sooner, especially Twitter which I think makes me a better person. And as you pointed out, you can use it in short spurts that is otherwise potentially wasted time.
I love DIY but it’s a time trade off so there again, no regrets here. When I retire, I think I will engage in more DIY projects as I find them very relaxing and rewarding, personally and financially. Regarding entertainment, I sit in silence all day at work, so I enjoy music after work. And since my kids moved out, silence is sometimes depressing.
Although I could probably use some targeted silent time perhaps for meditation, which would make me a better person, presumably.
Thought provoking post, enjoyed it.